Patriots like small balls, so what?

Just when I was going a little soft on my commitment to feel a life-long disdain for the New England Patriots reports surface alleging they deflated balls during the AFC Championship game. There goes that. Don’t get me wrong, a wee bit of air missing from a football doesn’t close the gap in what was one of the WORST conference championships I can remember, but it does certainly raise more red flags in clam chowder town. For the great coach he supposedly is, Bill Belichick can’t seem to shake the drama. First, Spy-gate… now, Shriveled-up-balls-gate (That’s just my title for it, professional writers are taking the more socially acceptable, less catchy route, dubbing it ‘Deflate-gate’… which is just boring).

Now, some are pointing out that this places the worthiness of the Patriot Super Bowl berth in a shroud of mystery and doubt but let’s take it for what it is, entertainment. Isn’t that what sports are all about? It’s the male’s (and, yes, some female’s) version of drama. It’s equivalent to The Bachelor’s Chris Soules admitting he’s probably kissed enough beautiful women on the Bachelor to last the rest of us a lifetime (Or, in my case, many lifetimes. By the way, I don’t watch the Bachelor… I swear). My point being, it’s drama and we all. love. drama. period. It’s why shows like The Bachelor and Bachelorette are still in existence 126 years later, and Skip Bayless still has a job– we enjoy discussing the latest juicy gossip and devastating rumors around the water cooler.

So how about this—instead of chiding Bill ‘Bend-the-Rules’ Belichick and the Pats, we embrace them for producing at least one story-line from that awful, awful, awful game. If it’s true they deflated balls should the Patriots forfeit draft picks? Ya… Should their reputation take a hit? Eh, sure, if you believe they had a good one to begin with… Should they be hated and scorned for their actions? No, because New England has done its job. The Pats whacked the crap out of the Colts, effectively putting us all asleep, then woke us all back up by reducing the size of their balls. It really doesn’t get any better than that.

Just in case you really, really care about the Patriot’s and Tom Brady’s balls here are some additional links:

Brady has admitted to liking Gronk’s tiny balls before:

Full synopsis to Deflategate:

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